You have to know how to have a little fun in life.

Ain't that the truth?

Hey! Have A Damn Fine Day!

Wednesday, May 4, 2005.

We want to welcome Rob to the group today! We've known each other for a while, and Rob finally decided to "take the plunge." Rob is another real interesting guy with a real interesting line of work....and we're looking forward to our working together. So.....

WELCOME ROB!

You know Bud....Life is about to get lots more interesting! :-)

Why do we mention around here that many of our guys have interesting work....you ask? Well, here's an example of a friend of ours who will soon be a member. Way to go Chris!

Is that interesting work....Or What?

And finally today, from our mail-bag....Niels & Marina, two of the nicest people on the planet and our recently married couple from Denmark, sent us this little note. Thanks Guys! :-) We really appreciate your kind thoughts!

Dear Nina and Greg,

You two are our true friends, because you helped Marinka and me to find
our happiness together.

Marinka and I am a very very happy couple. From day one, when we met each
other for the first time in Minsk airport, we have loved each other from
the bottom of our hearts. We are two not very ordinary persons, so it is
absolutely FANTASTIC that we where so lucky to find each other. We match
so well together, and we really cannot be without each other any more.

My wonderful wife IS really this wonderful combination of a well educated
woman (Marinka has just finished her specialization as a medical doctor),
and a very "old fashioned" woman, with all the traditional family values
intact. My Marinka is a wonderful wife, and I am the happiest husband in
the world.

Thank you to both of you for helping us with finding each other.
Your true friends from Denmark
Marina and Niels

Hey Everyone! Have A Damn Fine Day!

Saturday, May 7, 2005.

Tomorrow is Mother's Day!

And......Monday is Victory Day in Belarus! This holiday is similar to our Veteran's Day here in the USA.

We'll be hanging around here this weekend if anyone wants to give us a call. Enjoy your weekend....Don't forget about Mother's Day.....And.....

Have A Damn Fine Weekend!

Monday, May 9, 2005.

We hope everyone had a nice weekend?

Today is Victory Day in Belarus, and tomorrow is Rememberance Day. That holiday is when people go to the cemetary and leave flowers for their loved ones. This is a special holiday in Belarus. Also, as all you guys know who have your ladies, this is the time of year when people spend lots of time planting at the Dacha.

Don & Irina will be hitting the USA today from their Warsaw interview! We're waiting to hear from those guys.....And is it possible we'll have a little Chippy get-together soon? YEP!

CONGRATS DON & IRINA!

That's about it for today. We have a beautiful day today here in Akron, Ohio. We're looking for about 80 degrees here....Spring has finally arrived.

Hey! Have Yourself A Damn Fine Day!

Wednesday, May 11, 2005.

We were on the phone with Don & Irina, they made it here to the USA without any problems. Nina and Irina were talking about Irina's first impressions of the USA. Don took his Irina to a large grocery store.....And the shock is just wearing off now. All you guys who have brought your women to the West know what we're talking about on those first few days. Way to go Don! :-)

Our Russian women are so different from the fat-ass Western Bitches we're so accustomed to.....it's just amazing to behold.

And speaking of fat-ass Western Bitches.....Ed sent us a little story that all us guys who were once married to one of those will understand. Thanks Bud!

We call it....."Fat-Ass Decompression." Or...."Not tonight dear."

Subject: Not tonight dear.


I never quite figured out why the sexual urge of men and women  differ
so much. And I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing.

I have never figured out why men think with their head and women with
their heart.

FOR EXAMPLE:

One evening last week, my wife and I were getting into bed. Well, the
passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says "I don't feel like
it, I just want you to hold me."

I said "WHAT????!!! What was that?!" So she says the words that every
husband on the planet dreads to hear..."You're just not in touch with my
emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical needs
as a man."

She responded to my puzzled look by saying, "Can't you just love me for
who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?" Realizing that
nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep.

The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with
her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big
unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried on
several different very expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one
to take so I told her we'll just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to
compliment her new clothes, so I said lets get a pair for each outfit.

We went onto the jewelry department where she picked out a pair of
diamond earrings. Let me tell you...she was so excited. She must have
thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to  think she was
testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even
know how to play tennis. I think I threw her for a loop when I said,
"That's fine, honey."

She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement.

Smiling with excited anticipation she finally said, "I think this is all
dear, let's go to the cashier."

I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, "No honey, I don't
feel like it."

Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled
"WHAT?!"

I then said, "Really honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a
while. You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough
for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman."

And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I added,
"Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy
you?"

Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either

Poor guy.....

Remember....Stay out of trouble....Stay away from those nasty Western "women".....And.....

Have A Damn Fine Day!

Thursday, May 12, 2005.

Let's have a little fun this morning.....Our Bud Chris sent us this gem.

"The Flower of American Woman-Hood".....

OK, you all know the end of that old joke....." If I could find my keys I'd drive out!"

Hey! Have A Damn Fine Day!

Friday, May 13, 2005.

TGIF! Thank God It's Friday! But...It's Friday the 13th....So be careful out there today. Strange things can happen.....

There are times when too much just isn't good. Right?

Hey!.....

Have A Damn Fine Weekend!

Monday, May 16, 2005.

Hope you had A Damn Fine Weekend? We sure did!

It's Monday morning....we need a bit of humor around here to get our Butts moving. We have a chilly morning here in Akron....Our members Ed and Mark to the rescue with these: First, from Ed. Thanks Bud!

I hate when that happens!

Mark sent us this.....Proof that us guys are health aware too....Thanks Bud!

Life is good.....

Hey! Have A Damn Fine Day!

Wednesday, May 18, 2005.

I have always admired auto mechanics.....There's something admirable about opening the hood & peering inside the "engine" to see how it tiks.....

And then "fixing" it.....

Hey! We want to welcome Joe to the group today. Joe lives in the North-Eastern part of the USA, he's a real nice guy like all our guys.....we have spent some time on the phone getting to know each other. Joe is impressed by Nina's accent.....which I assure her isn't too bad...;-).....and we're looking forward to our working together. So.....

WELCOME JOE!

Life is about to get a Damn-Sight more exciting Bud!

And as always.....We wish everyone....A Damn Fine Day!

Friday, May 20, 2005.

We're looking forward to the weekend, yep....it's Friday already! We're looking forward to the rain blowing outta here....We're due for some nice Spring weather.

What's new around here is....Kalvin got back from his visit with his Natalia, Tom went to be with his Elena, and it won't be long now before Jacob will be on the plane to be with his Zhanna. Getting excited Jake? :-)

Also, Ed will soon be taking off for Vitebsk to be with his Natasha, and Keith will be on the plane soon to be with his Sveta. Getting excited guys? :-)

Nina found a nice joke for us....And believe me....It's great having a wife with a sense of humor! Thanks Sweetheart!

Caption reads...."Why are you smiling?"

Hey.....

Have A Damn Fine Weekend!

Monday, May 23, 2005.

We had a wonderful weekend here....Hope you did too!

You know, we get lots of calls and e-mail asking us why we're different than all the other "agencies" on the net. People ask us why we're different than for example A Foreign Affair, Elena's Models, and many other "agencies."

Our answer is this: We deal in reality, and we provide support after you're married, no matter which country you happen to call home. No other agency does that.

You can take a look at our Wedding Pages, our old Newsletters, and of course our Chippy Club Pages...... Oh.....speaking of our Chippy Club.....This is what we were up-to this weekend:

Don & Irina spent the weekend with us! Don's Irina got here on Monday, May 9....And they're now our newest members of our Chippy Club. Here's a few photos:

We lucked-out and had beautiful weather here this weekend.

I need to remember to suck-my-gut-in for these photos. :-)

Now this is what happiness looks like.....

Don & Irina are good people.....

And they happen to be a wonderful couple!

This is also what happiness looks like....

We had a fine weekend! Thanks Don & Irina for making the trip out here!

If you want reality....If you want to find your happiness with a good woman....Join our group. If you want to play games, the net has hundreds of "agencies" who love to play with your money. They love to sell you the addresses of women they don't know.

Be careful out there....And don't forget: Have A Damn Fine Day!

Wednesday, May 25, 2005.

Ed sent us a nice tid-bit....Thanks Bud!

Amazingly Simple Home Remedies

1.? If you are choking on an ice cube, don't panic.? Simply pour a
cup of boiling water down your throat and presto.? The blockage will
be almost instantly removed.

2.? Clumsy?? Avoid cutting yourself while slicing vegetables by
getting someone else to hold them while you chop away.

3.? Avoid arguments with the Mrs. about lifting the toilet seat by
simply using the sink.

4.? For high blood pressure sufferers: simply cut yourself and bleed
for a few minutes, thus reducing the pressure in your veins.?
Remember to use a timer.

5.? A mouse trap, placed on top of your alarm clock, will prevent
you from rolling over and going back to sleep after you hit the snooze button.

6.? If you have a bad cough, take a large dose of laxatives, then
you will be afraid to cough.

7.? Have a bad toothache?? Smash your thumb with a hammer and you
will forget about the toothache.

I especially like #5.

Hey! Don't forget.....

Have A Damn Fine Day!

Thursday, May 26, 2005.

This weekend is our Memorial Day holiday here in the USA.....and then we're into June already. Time flies.....

We've been operating our group now for over 4.5 years, and Nina and I need to remember that lots of our mail comes from guys who are new at this. We call 'em "newbies." One recurring newbie theme we get questions about is like this example sent to us last week....

So, to answer the question once again...." I would like to know if you would let me know how exactly this will work. "

The lady has no chance of getting a visitor visa to any Western country, including Australia and New Zealand, Western Europe, and the USA. The way it will work goes like this: This lady will take your money for her "trip"...you will never hear again from her once she gets the funds, and she will move on to the next newbie and take his money.

Now don't get us wrong here, everyone is a newbie at some point in time....everyone has to start somewhere. The difference between some newbies and others is this: Some understand they need help with this process before they get burned, some don't. The ones who do realize they need help will save themselves lots of time, money, and emotional investment.

We hope these tid-bits help a few newbies out there.

Hey! Be careful out there....and....Have A Damn Fine Day!

Friday, May 27, 2005.

It's Friday already, and Monday is Memorial Day in the USA. We want to wish all families around the world with family in the Armed Services Godspeed and a safe return home!

We know a lady who works at our local grocery store....Her son was wounded in Iraq last January. He had his fifth operation yesterday at Walter Reed Hospital....She told us yesterday that he's fine and will finally be able to come home in a few weeks.

Makes us think about life and what's important.

We wish everyone A Damn Fine Weekend!

Saturday, May 28, 2005.

We're having our coffee and tea this morning...Nina's a tea drinker....waking up....you understand.

Anyway, we were laughing at one of the idiots who's writing on the RWL. This topic comes up every once in a while and we enjoy the humor.....

If you've never followed the topic, it concerns these guys who purchase an address of a woman on some "grocery-store" site, they make the trip over there, and they try to devise some "tests" to make sure that particular woman really loves them. The funniest "test" is the "car test." This is the theory: You unlock the passenger side door of the car, let your lady get in, and the "test" part comes in here. The theory says that if she really loves you, she will reach over quickly to unlock the driver side door before the guy has a chance to unlock his door. This supposedly proves that the woman cares for the man. Here's part of a real post from the RWL:

"Have you ever given a woman the car test. (I
got it from some DeNiro movie.)  You let her in the passenger side
door and if by the time you get around to the driver's side she
hasn't reached over and unlocked your door, then she's failed.  I
gave it to my fiancee - more as an afterthought - by that time, I
already knew I wasn't going to marry her.  She failed.  She was very
defensive when I pointed it out to her."

I like the way this genius thinks, and being the curious type myself, I decided to put my Nina to the test. This is what happened.....

We got out to the car, we have the little keyless entry button, so I hit the unlock button. I let Nina get in.....and nothing happened!! She just sat there!!

At that point I was frantic. After 4 years of marriage, all the loving and caring she has shown me.....My Nina FLUNKED the famous car test!

I was hurt, dismayed, let me tell you, that 4 second trip around the ass-end of our car was the longest trip I ever took......Right up to the point where I opened my door and got in the car. Wait a minute.....I was really confused at this point....The door was unlocked!

What in the Hell happened??

Oh Crap! It was the keyless-entry button!

The theory doesn't cover that contingency!

I'll need to ponder this question a while....perhaps it would be a good idea to post my dilemma for the geniuses on the RWL. And by the way...I've come up with a new, and I think fool-proof test of sorts.........

I'm calling it the "Bang" test. All I need to figure-out is where I can get my hands on a live hand grenade. ( I saw this in an old World War II movie. ) It goes like this: I pull the pin on the grenade, drop it between Nina and I, and if she jumps on the grenade and blows herself up to protect me....That proves she loves me......She passes the test.

I hope she had some Spetznaz Military training in her younger days.....I really hope she did. I hope she knows what the Hell a hand grenade is. I'll work on those bugs in my theory, and I'll report the results of the test as they become available.

Hey! Have A Damn Fine Day!

Tuesday, May 31, 2005.

We hope everyone had a great weekend!

Clint & Maryna sent us these funnies. Thanks Guys!

It's the time of the Old West.

A citizen of the town comes running into the saloon and
screams, "Big Bad Bart is coming! Big Bad Bart is coming!
We gotta get outta town."

Everyone gets up in a hurry and takes off as fast as they
can, including the saloonkeeper, who, when hopping over the
bar, slips on a beer and knocks himself unconscious.

When he comes to, he makes his way outside to see the
biggest, meanest man he's ever seen riding down the center
of the town on two buffaloes, whipping them with a
rattlesnake screaming, "Giddyup! Let's go, come on."

He makes his way over to the saloonkeeper, dismounts, and
enters the saloon.

Breaking both doors off the hinges while entering, he walks
up to the bar, slams his fist down, breaking the bar in half
and hollers, "Gimme some beer in a gallon jug."

After the saloonkeeper hands him the jug, he watches as the
man drinks it in three seconds flat.

When he's done with his drink, the man turns around to walk
out the door.

The saloonkeeper couldn't believe his eyes and wanted to
see him do it again. He asks him, "Don't you want another
beer?"

The man turns around and says, "Heck no, Big Bad Bart is
coming! I gotta get outta town!"

mansion by the sea." Once again, everything went as expected - he
got his mansion, and the ex-wife got two.

"What would you like for your last wish?" asked the genie.

"My last wish is that I wish you would scare me half to death!"